Embrace the Paradox

Embrace the Paradox ~ Original Poetry © JA Valderrama

Archive for the tag “poems”

09 Dec 2014

Delicious Nothingness

Is it possible

That after so many iterations

I can forget why I’m here?

Keep on as I must

With my forward motion

Content to slowly lose hope

To live in quiet gratitude

Or was it only a patient sort of waiting?

For there you are

A spark that persists

Each time still,

An again pronounced in memory

In the now of this moment

I feel the realness of this, this

It pulses, stirring, pointed with immensity

And I am caught up and wondering inside

As I let go of history, the chattering turning to static

In the background…

Until we find ourselves standing on this sea

Everything floating and flowing

I wish to sing! To laugh madly

To taste without consequence to the stories

Yours and mine

I use the force of my will

Letting these thoughts wander

They find their way in, like tendrils of vines

Seeking cracks and fissures

To anchor upon and nestle within

I feel the moment, savoring it like sweet touch

My head fizzing, legs shaky, but feet on the ground

Happy to let it simmer forever

A delicious nothingness

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24 Jul 2014

Ready?

We scrunch down and make ourselves small
Afraid to stretch tall where it matters most
We have seen what happens
To those who dare speak of a different way
Martyrs, it seems they all became

Instead we pretend to be bold
By spouting off the same old jargon
Under the latest veneer
The braggadocio and tough talk

As if it’s courage and not quivering
That drives us to threat displays
Flashing around symbols of power and coercion
Like gold-toothed sharks feeding on frenzy

We are not ready, how can we not be ready?
Stunted in our growth as a species
Doubling in on ourselves
Tender love for humanity, aching in my heart
I am not one to dismiss us as a mistake
Though so often we seem out of step with creation
Little lost children defacing our playground
Forgetting who we are or where we came from

But I am getting too tired to be afraid
That clean feeling of being utterly spent
Liberating me from pretense and denial

Perhaps it is not too late for us
To stop skulking in the shadows
Like masters of darkness

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29 Jan 2014
1 Comment

Ever

I hear the melody, joyful and brash
A sweet sadness overtaking
Lyrical nostalgia, memory and aliveness
The thrumming beat of belief and import

Three years ago, notes broke the mold
A new era heralded, blazing like the sun
Yet there is no stopping and so we marched on
Enveloping, revising, overlooking
Forgetting much, buried in the now
But not the Now now, lost in the ticking of the clock

Then that tune plays again and I catch a glimpse
Like the thrill of a deep, rich breath
Cool air filling lungs with secret hope
It had seemed impossible then, to stretch that far
We did it somehow, glory ripening into old news

I am astounded by this so-called ordinariness
Of coming and going, beginnings and endings
The moments like waves, bringing tears to my eyes, ready to overwhelm
Others lament and deny, but to gasp at the tragic beauty!
To know, to feel, to be
From fresh darlings, daring and tender
To history done on our wistful skin
It is everything

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29 Dec 2012

We dip the cup

We dip the cup in the Stream

We freeze solid whatever flows in

Holding it in reverent fear,  like precious cargo

It melts, pooling in our palms

Dripping between our fingers, numb from cold

We act surprised, appalled even

Frantic in our belief that if it had truly been sacred,

It should have stayed frozen.

Buried in our blindness

Craving the deadened

 

They warn us against having a messiah complex

A diagnosis of delusions, of wrongness like food gone bad

So desperate to keep us quiet, our power harnessed and invisible

Casual but constant reinforcement of the lie of our ordinariness

Cut off from our own magic, embalmed with pills and pretty things

Suckered into apologies with derisive laughter and pitying looks

Our hands at each others’ throats in mutual strangulation

We watch the glow of our eyes fade with sick fascination

A little voice cries, fingers trembling, body shuddering

Until we try again

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08 Dec 2012

Cut Out My Own Tongue

Like if I cut out my own tongue

As if I could run from freedom

Too afraid to believe that my stories matter

What have I done, in hasty retreat

Defacing my dreams with a casual ease

Ratcheting up the blur and noise

To cover the siren scream of my heart

At least I have still have a voice

Not yet scraped to shredded bare

Though wary from everyday abuse

The cold curious gleam of vivisection

Raw twitching machine to stunted eyes

Obligatory torture to stymy my presence

Floating far away, to be anyone but me

How boring it must seem, our scramble to be less

Only so many times I can worry about the state of my dress

Waxing my ego to a fine sheen, false prophets enlisted

To carry me, feet off the ground, nerves lost in sticky thought

Forgetting what has brought me here, forgetting who I am

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